By Caroline Lee
Key Themes: poetry, diabetes, depression, understanding, hope
Mental health is not the only subject which is focused on; other important themes are touched upon. However many of these poems were written with the sole aim of dispelling the stigma which still surrounds mental health, they are a way of reaching out. It’s difficult for people to understand the pain that mental health causes, and it’s often hard for the sufferer to get across their true feelings. In poetry I found a way of sharing the complexity and the ups and downs of this illness.
About the Author
Caroline Lee was born in November 1977 in Bristol. She grew up in Somerset, and was dealt a devastating blow when at the age of 12 she was diagnosed with Insulin Dependent Diabetes. After her diagnosis she started at Sidcot School, where she had a blissfully happy time and was first introduced to poetry. She later went on to read Theology and English Literature at LSU, Southampton. Following a stay in The Priory in 2005 Caroline started writing poetry: her poems were a way of releasing pain and pressures, from the depression she was experiencing and had experienced and from the highs and lows of everyday life. Caroline lives and works in London.
MISUNDERSTANDING THE UNDERSTOOD
Life is what you make of it
Is that not what they say?
When life is as good as this
Someone must merit some pay?
You’re on top of the world
With even Heaven under your feet
How, why and when does not matter
When experiencing the feat of all feats
With no chance of persons residing
Exclusively on one’s planet
Hearing their voices, seeing their looks
Ignorant to them thinking…“she’s manic”
The buzz creeps up inside you
Unaware that something’s wrong
The fabulous feeling of an illegal hit
Why oh why doesn’t it last so long?
The flick of the switch
Up or down is anyone’s guess
To be high as the highest kite
Or in the black of the blackest mess
Floating around in ecstasy
Becoming the persona of Freddie
Nothing can stop me from flying
Only coming down when fully ready
So much to be done. No chance
Of sleep or rest to be taken
How can I waste my time
To lie in bed and awaken?
The euphoria moves right in
The electricity is in place
Not standing still for a second
Knowing its more speed, and more haste
The disco balls are turning
On the hi-fi just one song
A party that lasts forever
How can that be seen as so wrong?
Knowing you could do anything
All the power within your hands
Winning your hardest battle
Working out the hardest plan
The atomic body topped with adrenaline
With words of thoughts flying out
The speed of the flight is apparent
The words muddled, but still the need to shout
Losing touch with all that’s real
The terrific buzz thinking you are God.
Sitting in a consultant’s room
Unfamiliar with the seriousness of the doc’s nod
Pleading to those who’ll hear
‘Don’t stop me now (can’t you see)
I’m having such a good time’
This girl before you now….is happy!
The stare on their faces tell me
That the confusion of this disorder
Is something that the norm can’t grasp
Even if, clued up, on what They call bipolar
MORE POETRY FROM CHIPMUNKA
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