Pain is my Pleasure


The Autobiography of a Mental Health Patient
By Tahir Mahmood Malik


ISBN: 978-1-904697-90-9
Published: 2005
Pages: 37
Key Themes: Islam, ethnic minorities, mental health services, addiction, depression, panic attacks

"I wrote my book to make people aware that when one has everything, life is easy. But when one has nothing, that is the time when you realise what life is all about. I also wanted to show how people can turn against you if they know you have mental illness." - Tahir Mahmood Malik


This book is an autobiographical account of Tahir's breakdown and subsequent recovery with the help of the mental health services. Tahir suffered an awful breakdown in his marriage during which he was psychologicallly bullied and damaged. He turned to addiction to ease his worries but this only resulted in bankruptcy and panic attacks.

Tahir has written this fantastic book to raise awareness of mental health issues, particularly in the Asian community. It is an honest account of the good and bad times in his life and argues that mental health sufferers should not be ashamed of their plight. This helpful, supportive and inspirational book proves that recovery is possible, particularly with the support of effective mental health services.

About the Author

I had everything, a happy marriage, financial security, a good job and reputation. But when I became ill, I lost all my income, was declared bankrupt, my marriage broke down and my family turned against me. I nearly died from pneumonia and was left on my own. That's were the mental health services helped me rediscover myself. I suffer from severe panic attacks, which resulted in me not able to go out on my own for a long time. I broke my hand three times due to those attacks and even attempted suicide; but I was saved by my mental health team. After the way my wife treated me I felt all alone in this world, but the mental health team have given me a reason to put back something into society. They made me feel welcomed and special. Being a Pakistani Muslim I feel it is important to get my message across, as lots of the younger generation out there have problems, and they need to know that there is help out there for them. As I have found, keeping it all in only results in failure and harm to yourself. I am one of the lucky few who, after all that has happened to me, have still found time to write this book. I may never be able to recapture the old me, but if my book helps anyone, that would give me a real sense of achievement. Tahir Mahmood Malik

Tahir recently won an UnLtd award and is now a social entrepreneur, he works hard to eliminate stigma and improve understanding of mental illnesses.

Book Extract

Monday 10th August 1970 at 6.05 hours a child is born to Mrs Mukhtar Begum Malik at the South London Hospital for Women, U.K. The child - a boy, weighs 6lb4oz, the first British born child to the Malik family.

His mother had come to visit her parents in the U.K. who had migrated from Kenya many years ago. His father was working in Kuwait and was not present at time of birth.

Mrs Malik was expected to travel back to Kuwait for my delivery. The British Government would not allow her to travel in her condition of 8 months pregnancy.

The child was named Tahir Mahmood Malik, that’s me. My grandfather Aziz Bux Malik said the ‘Azaan’ in my ear. This is very special tradition in Islam. The first thing a newborn hears is the name of ALLAH who has brought him into this world.

It is said that I was born with a smiling face and my maternal uncle said that it seems that he will bring a lot of happiness to everyone.

I was named after the youngest brother of my mother. He died at the age of twelve. He was a victim of a bomb blast during the partition of India and Pakistan. This cost him his speech and hearing. Despite being deaf and dumb he was a happy child and brought happiness to everyone.

  • Model: e-book
  • 100 Units in Stock

Please Choose:

pdf e-book

Current Reviews: 1

This product was added to our catalog on Wednesday 01 November, 2006.